He Was Always the Only Asian Kid in the Gym. Then He Finally Wasn’t.

This is part of The Stories That Made Us, a series spotlighting the memories, communities, and moments that shaped our Apex team into who they are today.

Staff Spotlight: Stephen – Apex for Youth, Athletics Program Manager, Brooklyn. 

Stephen grew up in Midland Park, a small suburb in New Jersey, shuttling between gyms, rest stops, and courts across the state and the country. His parents sacrificed weekends, evenings, and school breaks to fuel his passion for sports. Their support was unwavering.

But something still felt off.

“I felt a pull in two directions,” he says. “I didn’t fit in with the kids in my predominantly white town, and I lacked a connection with my Asian heritage.”

He was often the only Asian kid in the gym. He wasn’t sure he was fully aware of it at the time, but he felt it.

The Stranger at Basketball Camp

The turning point came from an unlikely place: Another dad at a sleepaway basketball camp who approached Stephen’s father and invited them to a New York Rockits practice in Chinatown, a Chinese basketball organization.

Stephen remembers feeling nervous on the way there. Would he fit in? Would his teammates accept him? Was he even Asian enough to belong?

He walked in. Everyone welcomed him immediately.

“I found other kids who were going through the same things as I was,” he says. “I was surrounded by a team of players, coaches, and parents who looked like me.”

Sunday Mornings and Chinatown Afternoons

What followed became the rhythm of his adolescence. Sunday mornings were for practice. Sunday afternoons were for exploring Chinatown with teammates, his first $8 haircut, Wah Fung’s $5 roast pork over rice, and learning to perform the lion head in the annual Chinese New Year parade.

It sounds like small stuff. But for a kid who had never quite belonged anywhere, it was everything.

“Joining the Rockits was my mission moment,” Stephen says. “I realize now how important it was for young kids to have that moment of acceptance. To have a community of peers and adults who support and look out for them.”

What He Carries Into Apex for Youth

Years later, Nelson Yu, one of his Rockits coaches, reached out to Stephen to see if he was interested in a part-time job for the basketball program at Apex for Youth.

That’s how it started. Stephen worked part-time, then full-time, and has now been with Apex for nearly six years.

Not every parent has the time, money, or resources to provide what his parents gave him. Many Asian families, he notes, emphasize academics above all else, and their kids can miss out on what sports can offer: community, identity, belonging, resilience.

At Apex, Stephen helps fill that gap. Every day, he works to create for young people what the Rockits created for him.

“Where every kid can have their moment of acceptance,” he says, “and find a place where they can explore and try new things. Where there is a community of peers and adults who will help them find their way, as I found mine.”

The Rockits gave Stephen a north star. Now he’s helping youth find theirs.